Fair Play Life is based on the New York Times bestselling book Fair Play by Eve Rodsky. In the book she explores the gender roles in the home and how the division of labor between partners and couples is divided up.
The author uses her background in mediation law and organization management to offer out solutions and systems to women and couples who are struggling to balance the mental load and 2nd shift at home. Think laundry, meal prepping, cooking, getting kids to/from activities, scheduling doctor appointments, calling the handyman when something needs to be fixed, paying the bills, managing your finances, and the list goes on and on. Any task that relates to managing home life with a partner/kids basically.
The basis of the book is that THE most important organizational process in our lives is our home life, and just like businesses set up operational processes to run efficiently, we as individuals should also be thinking about how to replicate these processes in our homes to help our household run more smoothly.
As a Fair Play Life Certified Facilitator I coach women, couples, and organizations how to implement these methods and solutions into their day to day allowing them more time and space for themselves, their partners, and their families.
Recent research shows that:
70% of top male earners in the US have a spouse who stays at home.
Mothers reduced their time spent working 4.5x more than fathers did during COVID.
It is estimated that there are 2.3 million estimated cases of burnout among working mothers due to unequal demands of home and work life.
Try these 3 simple steps to create to more happiness, peace, space, and time into your lives:
1. Invite your partner to play the Fair Play Life Card Game. You can purchase the cards here, or just create your own DIY version by making a list of all the household tasks you and your partner are responsible for on a day to day basis. The deck for purchase includes 100 household chores so you have an idea of how long your list should be. Make it fun, over dinner or wine! Ask your partner "if we could implement a system in our home that allows both of us more time and space to do the things we love would you want that?"
You can't say no to that!
2. Start dealing the cards. Once you've divided up the cards into piles of who defaults to what task, try discussing a few of them individually. Note you will most likely have a "both pile." Discuss which ones do you dislike/like? What are your strengths and weaknesses? Try trading for the upcoming week one or two that you don't love that maybe your partner doesn't mind doing. For instance, maybe you despise doing laundry, but discover that your spouse doesn't mind it, and you realize you've built up resentment doing that task week in and week out. For the next week trade that card and see how that feels and what you are able to do with your "laundry time" instead. Or maybe you determine that you both hate a certain task and that you should outsource that one.
Don't forget, off loading a task to your partner includes CPE:
Conceptualization- thinking through all the details of the task.
Planning- from start to finish.
Execution- following through and completing the task.
So in the case of a 4th grade science project, owning that card would look something like:
C- Reading through the assignment, talking it through with your child, determining what you will build, and figuring out the supplies needed.
P- Reading and researching, making a list of supplies/buying, and determining a timeline for completing the project. E- Working on the project from start to finish and ensuring it's turned in on time.
3. Schedule a weekly check in
Find a block of time for you and your partner to discuss the upcoming week or day. What's working or not working, what cards you potentially need to trade that week due to meetings or other commitments? This can done be each evening after dinner, before bed after the kids are asleep, or on a Sunday night before the week starts. The check in session/time is personal and may look different for everyone.
Interested in learning more or booking a 1hr intro coaching session to start implementing these solutions into your life? Or want to bring Fair Play Life into your organization to help your working mothers (and fathers)? Email me at sarah@sperrywellness.com
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